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Yes, I am as tired as I look

Yes, I am as tired as I look - if not more so

So I’m blogging from the Apple Store on Regent Street after attending the Maths in Action day at the Institute of Education, as part of a smaller-than-anticipated party from my college.

After arriving in London on the same train as a man who looked like a clean-shaven Gordon Freeman and getting the Tube to Russell Square, we had a lecture on the science of how diseases spread through social networks.

Unfortunately for the Daily Mail, this doesn’t mean any Facebook users should be quarantined. However, the story of how networks can be modelled is fascinating: there is a ’sweet spot’ in the area of randomisation of small-world networks to provide a “realistic” model of a network. There was also discussion of Erdős–Bacon numbers.

After this, we had some discussion of why buildings fall and collapse during earthquakes, followed by a lecture with the title At Home With Maths, which seemed to cover why cardioids are formed by light reflecting in cups, among other things.

After lunch, we had a lecture from the computer science department at Queen Mary, University of London on mathematically-inspired illusions. Mercifully, it wasn’t Britain’s Got Talent-style, but instead featured computer science such as algorithms to help sort through cards, or tricks of the mind that are also used in MP3 compression. (It sounds weird… I might explain later, if I have the time.)

And finally, just as we were all beginning to drop off, we were re-awakened by the fabulous Colin Wright, a juggler-turned-mathematician-turned-software developer-turned-maritime traffic controller. He led us through the mathematics of juggling, how to describe a juggling trick in writing, and generally spent an afternoon demonstrating why he was a lot better than all of us put together (even though he was in the private sector).

Overall, it was a very interesting series of lectures about the application of maths in the real world. Often, we take for granted how much maths actually goes into everything. (Me typing on this MacBook Pro, for example, involves millions upon millions of mathematical calculations simply to bring the words up on to the screen then portray them, across teh intertubes, to the server.)

Anyway, this brief period of mathematical nerdgasm is now complete. Normal service resumes shortly.

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I am annoyed.

I decided to go and see the independent sci-fi movie Moon, because I’m a fan of cerebral science fiction and, while Star Trek was great, it was rather… loud. Now, my local cinema, the Vue in Camberley, rarely shows independent films (the last time it did was Slumdog Millionaire, if I remember correctly) so I had a look on the Odeon web site.

I was anticipating they’d be playing it at Bracknell, and failing that, Guildford, because both are quite large cinemas and both have an independent movie club (or, at least, they did the last time I went there.)  As it turned out, they weren’t. The closest they are playing Moon is in Richmond. Which is in London.

I quickly looked up train times, and it’ll cost me £10.90 for a super off-peak return from Camberley. Allegedly, the journey will be 57 minutes, but that doesn’t account for the time it takes me to get to the station, the change at Ascot, or the part actually finding the cinema on the other side.

But anyway… I digress. I did book a ticket at Richmond, and it was extortionate. £9.35 was the cost of the ticket, and they wanted an extra 75p for the privilege of paying by card. How else was I supposed to pay? Magic a cheque to Odeon’s headquarters? Beam a ten pound note across? Deliver it by hand?

So, with the overall £10.10 cost of the ticket, plus £10.90 transport, this trip to the cinema has now cost me £20. £20 for a trip to the damn cinema. I don’t mind the train ticket as much, because at least our train services are reasonably reliable… but £10.10 for one ticket to the cinema is way too much. Especially considering the food and drink they supply is stupendously expensive.

If anyone from Odeon ever reads this (which I doubt they will) here’s a message: I am paying £10.10 for a ticket, but reluctantly. I certainly won’t be doing it again. Why you couldn’t play the film at more cinemas is beyond me, as is the bizarre 75p ‘card handling fee’.

Of course, I could have torrented the film, and it wouldn’t have cost me a penny. I could have waited for it to come out on DVD. I’m probably the exception here, but if cinema tickets are so expensive (along with the food and sparse distribution), is it any wonder nobody pays to go to the movies any more?

There. Rant over. Normal service resumes shortly.

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